


Hallowed Ground

by wholeo9



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Anniversary, Religion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-21
Updated: 2017-11-21
Packaged: 2019-02-05 05:08:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12787662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wholeo9/pseuds/wholeo9
Summary: Raphael knew it would be painful, but the pain is what makes it real.





	Hallowed Ground

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gqmfacacia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gqmfacacia/gifts).



> I rarely write fanfic but was inspired by the David Castro Fanbook Project. You can find it here, http://bit.ly/DavidFanbook. Enjoy!

Raphael Ortiz Santiago remembered, by accident that the anniversary was approaching. He hadn’t realized the date until he looked at the calendar. It was the anniversary of the day he was reborn. He doesn’t like to think about it. Every time he gets flooded with emotions of anger, resentment, and hatred. But then there are those of love and belonging. Those sacred and beautiful feelings are reserved for Magnus Bane – the one person who helped him understand his purpose.

Every year, on the anniversary, Raphael visits the grave of his friends from before his rebirth. It is a painful experience – both physically and emotionally. Walking on hallowed ground is agonizing but Raphael can’t distinguish it from the pain in his heart. Of what he had done all those years ago. He regrets it. Every time. Every moment. Every death. But regrets can’t change the past. He has to live with it every day. 

As he approached the cemetery, he knew what to expect. It’s a mental preparation for what is to come. Raphael knew it would be painful, but the pain is what makes it real. Every step forward is another hot needle that first starts at his feet and somehow burns his entire body. It’s as if his entire body is being branded by a hot stick. Although he comes here every year for the past 50 years, each time feels different. Like he is rediscovering a different kind of pain. 

He managed to walk to where his friends are buried. He paused for a moment to try to gather his thoughts and evoke fond memories. It’s simple, really. He had so many good ones. But all he can conjure are the ones he keeps trying to push away. He pulls out his mother’s rosary – the same one she gave to him so many nights ago and begins to chant the novena. Rafael has lost so much these past years, but his faith has not faded. It keeps him grounded. Whole. The words comfort him and give him peace…even if it’s only for a few fleeting moments.


End file.
